School's Out!

School is out for a whole month! It's party time!
The semester ended with a fizzle and a bang - lots of grading, a few papers to write, and all A's! We have enjoyed our first week off by sleeping in, eating scones and eggs for breakfast every single day, playing with J.J., reading FUN books, and watching Northern Exposure. We've also been playing lots of Christmas music, wrapping presents, making gingerbread cookies, and spending time with friends and family.
Last night we enjoyed our first date night in 4 months. We went to Houlihan's and saw the new Sherlock Holmes in theater. Both (the food and movie) were incredible.
Hurray for no school! I feel like a kid who just woke up to find snow on the ground and school canceled!
Only TWO days until Christmas!!! Merry Christmas everyone! I hope your heart's dearest wish (which seldom comes in a wrapped package) will be yours this Christmas.

A Funeral, the Flu, and the Silver Lining

I apologize to anyone who has checked my blog recently, hoping for an update, and finding the sober announcement of my uncle's death in November. We have had a lot going on - between family visits, mourning, eating, grading, writing, and sleeping, I haven't had the time to update. But today is the launching of finals week, when things slow down as the semester finally...finally...ends.
Thanksgiving Break was different this year. Because my beloved uncle passed away the week prior to Thanksgiving, it was not the usual cheerful holiday. We drove a state away to attend the funeral and spend time with my cousin and her family. It was so good to be together. It was healing, in fact. The funeral was tough, but something that I think my uncle would have liked. My cousin designed a Denver Broncos wreath, and we decorated the small church altar with some pictures and his favorite things. The funeral opened with "Carry on my Wayward Son," by Kansas. As soon as we heard the opening chords, Kaylen and I burst into tears and held each other. Hearing those words made me realize how final it was - he was really gone. Thankfully, the irony of the amazing guitar solo playing in a Baptist church halted the water-works, because we couldn't help but laugh. He would have loved it. I opened the funeral with some words that I wrote to share who he was, and what he meant to me and our family. I cried more than once. Jonathan then read a poem that a friend sent me, who also lost a family member to cancer this fall. Another song, Freebird, kept the old people awake. Then the preacher spoke, or rather, rambled, for an eternity. We all decided that my uncle would have zoned out before he had gotten halfway through his speech. Alex had the sense to take a nap. The funeral concluded with "Wish you were here" by Pink Floyd. I think he would have been satisfied, particularly with all of the disgruntled church members upon hearing rock and roll in their church. :) The rest of the visit with my cousin was nice. We got to reminisce about our childhoods, laugh and cry over memories. I'm so glad we were able to be together.


After returning from out of state, I spent all day cooking a delectable Thanksgiving feast for my mom, sister, and her boyfriend. We had lentil loaf (like meatloaf only without the carcass), red mashed potatoes, fresh green beans with garlic and almonds, glazed carrots, home-made rolls, and a pumpkin pie from scratch. It was my first attempt at a pie crust, and I was really pleased with how it came out. The recipe was from my new favorite website: http://peasandthankyou.com/recipage/?recipe_id=6005683.

Lucky me, I came down with the flu the day before Thanksgiving. Fever, aches, chills, congestion, sore throat - yuck. And I even got a flu shot! Must have been one of those strains they couldn't predict. My niece came down with it at the same time, so I'm blaming the church ladies at the funeral. :) Fortunately, I wasn't too sick to taste, which brings me to the silver lining of this holiday tale...
The PIE. I was able to enjoy lots of pumpkin pie, which is just about one of my favorite things. And so good on a sore throat. I was also able to spend time with many family members over the holiday. So while I was mourning the loss of my uncle (father), I was reminded of how grateful I am to have so many other loving family members. If I have learned nothing else from the loss of my aunt, uncle, and grandparents in the last 9 years, it is to cherish every moment spent with those I love. I have also learned to never let the sun go down on my anger, make "I love you" the last thing I say before parting, and have compassion for others' faults (God knows I hope others will show compassion toward mine). This year I am thankful for my many friends and family members - I value each and every one of you.
And I had an extra helping of mashed potatoes for you, Uncle Ricky.

Goodbye to a hero, rock star, dad, uncle, papa, and brother

You will always be missed, and never forgotten.
6/5/1957 - 11/15/2011

Busy Fall

It has been a very busy month. During the third week in October, two very good friends from my Department came from out of state for a thesis defense. It was a fantastic reunion, and both of them stayed with us for three days. I had a great time playing hostess, making scones, being a thesis cheerleader, and having great conversations with friends and kindred spirits whom I seldom see now. It was a sad parting! Miss you girls!
We had more plans for Halloween this year than any in the past. We went to two different friends' houses for pumpkin carvings and dinner. Both couples have kids, and we had a blast carving, roasting marshmallows, and playing games. I think Halloween is about kids, so it was such a nice change to spend the weekend with a total of 6 great kids. We ended up with two cool pumpkins to light up on Halloween.
On the night of, we stayed home, watched a scary movie, and Jonathan enjoyed a local brewery's pumpkin ale - the best beer EVER!
So far November has been off to a good start. The weather has been wonderful. I am enjoying every single minute of our Fall leaves - they have stayed around much longer than usual it seems. I love all of the bold colors - orange, deep red, yellow, gold. I am also enjoying trying some new recipes in my "spare" time - pumpkin soup, various types of scones, new spaghetti and curry recipes, and lots of hot chocolate. As two huge Christmas fanatics, we decorated the entire house, including putting up the tree, last weekend. We like to put it all up early, because the time goes by so fast. We are already humming Christmas tunes and making our gift lists for family and friends. Hurray for the holidays!

Bittersweet

Last weekend Jonathan, my mom and sister, J.J., and I piled into our Prius and drove to Kentucky to visit my uncle, cousin, and her family. My uncle Ricky is fighting liver cancer, and he is one of the dearest men in my life. My cousin Kaylen and I grew up in the same home with my mother, aunt, and uncle. All of my best childhood memories are from the years in Colorado when we all lived together. Memories of my aunt and uncle. My aunt has been gone for 9 years as of this month. My grandfather followed my aunt three years after her death, and my grandmother passed three years after his death. Now, three years after my grandmothers death, 6 years after my grandfather, and 9 after my aunt, my uncle is gravely ill. My family is devastated to say the least.
Despite the bitter occasion for this family gathering, we enjoyed one another's company. We recorded my uncle telling stories from our childhoods, stories we've heard hundreds of times but wanted to have in digital form to cherish after he's gone. We played Quelf and Charades, and laughed a lot. It was good to be there to support my cousin, who is caring for her father day and night. I'm proud of you, Kaylen. Wish we were there to help you.
My uncle and his girls J.J. loving on Alex under the table
The trips there and back were amusing, if for no other reason than to see the crowded backseat. J.J. was sprawled all over my mom, who was squished in between him and Amanda. They were real troopers - didn't complain at all that they could barely move and had dog slobber all over them. 6 hours is a long time to sit in that condition! If you have any prayers or positive thoughts to spare, please send them our way. My uncle is thankfully still with us, but we know that it is only a matter of time. Waiting is tough, especially from a distance. Uncle Ricky - You are still "Bad to the Bone"

"The Universe knows what it's doing"

This blog has always been mainly an account of everyday life in our family - average comings and goings, big and small triumphs and stressors. I've always felt a certain hesitancy about sharing anything too deep or personal, convicted that the internet is not the best medium to convey such things. But frankly, I've read some beautifully revealing blogs and I admire the authors' courage. Their honest posts help me in my own struggles, and I appreciate that they take the leap to bear their hearts through this most impersonal of mediums. Well, I'm ready to take that leap, at least just once.

For all who know me well, it comes as no surprise that my deepest desire in life is to be a mother. I have yearned to fulfill (or at least begin!) this purpose for a long time. Jonathan and I decided that we would commemorate our 5 year wedding anniversary by initiating efforts to start our family. (It sounds kind of clinical saying that way, but I don't want to overwhelm you with too much information.) :) Overjoyed to be starting the family I have fantasized about for years, I have been tracking my fertility for nearly 5 months. (For those of you women out there who don't do this - you need to! It's liberating to have a full understanding of the beautiful process our bodies go through every month in order to produce life. I highly recommend reading "Taking Charge of Your Fertility." It will change how you view your body!) Okay, many people think I'm OCD or crazy for charting my fertility, which is understandable given how few people are aware of fertility tracking and its many benefits. Still, I have found it highly fulfilling, so I try to ignore all the snarky comments about how obsessive I am. The charting has paid off. No, I'm not pregnant. However, the charting allowed me to track some weird fertility signs for the past three months more accurately. I have not had a period in more than 3 months. Weird, huh? I felt continually worried, stressed, disappointed, and sad every time I would take a pregnancy test, thinking that my period was overdue. I've also grown despondent with hearing - "You're just stressed - try not to think about it!" or "It's probably the pill." Greeeaaat...that's really helpful. Try not thinking about a white elephant - can YOU do it? Yeah, didn't think so.

Fed up with these well-intentioned but not-so-helpful comments, I decided to see a doctor week before last. And guess what - he loved my charts! He is an OB and he thoroughly read my charts from the past 5 months. He said they were extremely helpful and some of the nicest he's seen in practice. (Gold star for me!) He said what I was experiencing was absolutely not normal, and I have numerous other symptoms that interested him. He took some blood to run tests and I had the whole weekend to wait.

My follow-up appointment was last Monday and he had some very interesting news for me. I have hypothyroidism. And a bad case of it, too. Normal TSH levels range from .4-4.0 (with 2.0-4.0 considered "subclinical hypothyroidism"). My TSH levels were 22.7. Seriously!
I've had more than a week to think about this and my emotions have ranged from surprise, to elation, excitement, relief, bouts of crying and smiling, gratitude, disappointment, etc. I will be taking hormone replacement therapy for the rest of my life and will have to be closely monitored when I do get pregnant.

Overall, I am immensely relieved. First, this explains so many things that I've struggled with my entire life: constipation (despite fiber supplements), dry skin, fatigue, depression/moodiness, brittle nails, amenorrhea alternating with heavy periods, and most of all, unexplainable weight gain. I have led a super healthy lifestyle for years now - vegetarian, no fried foods, no soda, no sugar, whole grains, low fat, lots of veggies - working out every other day, running, yoga. In the midst of this, I have gained 10 pounds in a year (nearly 10% of my body weight) while eating around 1200 calories a day and working out. I've gained 4 of those pounds in two months while dieting. I've been so frustrated and depressed about this, not realizing that there is a real cause (I was beginning to think that this is just a woman-thing). Most people with hypothyroidism tend to be overweight, so I'm lucky that I have always worked hard to be healthy. I was beginning to wonder if it would ever pay off, but I can see now that it did - I'm not overweight! :)

Relief #2: I never thought I would say this, but I am relieved that I didn't get pregnant. Untreated hypothyroidism, even mild cases, increases the risk for miscarriage, preeclampsia, preterm birth, and stillbirth, as well as birth defects. Jonathan and I are both very grateful that I am getting treatment before getting pregnant. Once my thyroid levels are normal, I will be fine to get pregnant and the baby will be safe.

Thus the title of this post is what my mother always says: "The Universe knows what it's doing." There was a reason that I was not getting pregnant, and unbeknownst to me, it was a very good one. This has been yet another lesson in patience and learning not to get too attached to the plans that I have for my life. I'm a good planner, but plans made on limited information (and we will always only have limited information) should be viewed as tentative at best.

Happy Birthday, Jonathan!

Last weekend we celebrated Jonathan's 28th birthday! Fortunately for us, his birthday almost always falls on the Labor Day weekend/holiday, allowing us to enjoy the time off to celebrate. (We still did homework of course.) The festivities began when Ricky came up to surprise Jonathan on Friday night. He and I had planned the surprise. He showed up at 8pm at our door, and the look of shock on Jonathan's face was hysterical. You could see him thinking: "How Ricky could possibly be here? Did he say he was coming and I forgot somehow? What is going on?" After he figured out that it was a birthday surprise, he was ecstatic. We stayed up late talking, playing MarioParty, and eating homemade hummus. Saturday we explored campus and picked up pizza downtown. More GameCube and tasty food. Sunday we all did some homework and watched movies, played games, and went for a walk on the trail at sunset. Monday morning dawned beautiful - a perfect Fall morning. The air was crisp and clean, smelling of leaves; not a single cloud marred the blue sky. A perfect day for a birthday! Ricky unfortunately had to leave us after breakfast, but we so enjoyed his visit. After lunch we went to play miniature golf. We weren't great to begin with, but did much better toward the end of the game. We tied! (That surprised Jonathan.) :) Then we went to dinner at Houlihan's - they email you a coupon for a free dinner entree up to $15 for birthdays, so we had a very tasty and affordable dinner. After dinner we enjoyed dessert - homemade cheesecake cookies. Yum! It was a great birthday weekend. Thank you to everyone who called, emailed, or visited!


The previous weekend we went south to visit family and attend Jonathan's uncle's retirement party. It was a great chance to get together with the cousins, and all of the siblings were there. We played Disney charades and had a lot of fun staying up late and laughing.

Last days of summer

The Fall semester started yesterday, which means that summer officially ended for us on Sunday. We had a wonderful, busy summer. We are not too sad to see it go because we have a lot of exciting new things going on this semester. For one, Jonathan is starting a new PhD program that he is very passionate about, and he is surrounded by interesting and kind people in his new Department. He will be co-teaching two classes and taking 12 hours (9 is full-time in Grad School). He's also co-teaching a class in September for a scholars program on taking the GRE. So many awesome opportunities!
I am starting my final year of coursework in the PhD program. Hurray - only two semesters of coursework to go! Things I'm looking forward to: working on and submitting my dissertation proposal by the end of the semester, taking a Nursing class on childbearing women and newborns, and getting halfway through my Public Health graduate certificate.
To conclude the summer, I thought I would post a few pictures from the last few weeks of our summer. We visited and hosted lots of friends and family, read a lot of books (I'm on book 6 of Harry Potter!), experimented with new recipes, went for bike rides, took yoga classes at a studio, and lots of other things that I am probably forgetting. I don't have pictures from every fantastic meal and visit with friends and family, but here are a few. Cousin Gathering - playing telepictionary J.J. really belongs in water Visits from family and friends A lovely bike ride on the trail

5 Year Anniversary

On Tuesday, we celebrated our 5 year wedding anniversary. It is such a strange feeling - it feels sometimes like we've always been married, but at others, feels like it was just last week that we were standing on the beach in Mexico exchanging vows. I can only imagine how much weirder that feeling gets by the 40th wedding anniversary!
To celebrate, we went to St. Louis to do some cheap and/or free nerdy activities.
We started the day at the Cahokia Mounds, the largest prehistoric man-made earthen structure north of Mexico. I've always wanted to go, but never had the opportunity. We had a picnic lunch near the tallest mound. We had a great 360 degree view of the area, including St. Louis, from the top of Monk's Mound. The weather was lovely - pretty hot with the sun beating down on us, but breezy and not as hot as a few weeks ago.
After the Cahokia Mounds, we drove back into STL to visit the Science Museum. Free admission and lots of fun stuff to do. Our favorite part was the planetarium, where we enjoyed a live show of 'tonight's sky.' It was perfect except for the old lady who laid down right next to Jonathan and provided an annoyingly constant commentary about what she was seeing. We kept laughing, though, so it was okay. After the planetarium, we went to dinner on The Hill at a Spanish/Italian place. Very tasty and affordable.
After dinner, we went home and had dessert and decaf mochacinno's.
Thank you so much for being the best husband I could ever dream of, Jonathan. Each day is a new adventure together.

Chicago, Harry Potter finale, and a lot of work

Wow. It has been SO busy around here these past three weeks! So I do apologize for the long delay in posting, but I can't relate how busy we've been. The fog is only today starting to lift from my overloaded brain. Seems like I say that a lot, don't I? :) Here's what's been going on for us.
First, two weeks ago we got to see the Harry Potter finale. It was awesome! We went with a friend and two of his children who are big fans. It was quite an experience. We're both still working on the books. They take a long time to read when you only have the 10 minutes before bed to read. But they're so good! The weekend before last we went to the local vineyard where they were introducing their new collector's wines - free tasting. We enjoyed the view from a bluff overlooking the river.
The reason I've been so busy is because I've been teaching my own class, which is two hours of lecture every day. Lectures have to be written, presentation slides made, exams made and graded, reviewing the readings, etc. There is no doubt at all, though - I LOVE it. I walked back from class today with a huge smile on my face. I picked two opposing readings about female genital mutilation that the students debated. They were so into it and had so many great thoughts about the topic. They really seemed to enjoy it. It's an incredible feeling to be part of it. I would like to be in that kind of environment regardless of the topic that I'm teaching.
As I've mentioned previously, I'm also taking a Public Health class this summer toward a Graduate certificate in Public Health. It's a 16 week course shoved into 8 weeks, so it was very intense. I just finished it yesterday morning and am so relieved. The only thing I have left to do before school starts in August is administer the final exam in my class tomorrow, grade it, and post the students' final grades. Yea!
We were also rushing around a lot last week because we were gone over the weekend. My best friends from Belgium came to visit and were in Chicago, so we went to see them. After an 8 hour drive on Friday (lots of construction!), we arrived at their aunt and uncle's house. It was lovely - we had fantastic food, were treated like family, and got a personal tour of Chicago on Saturday. It is so hard to only see them once every year or two, but we talk enough on the phone that it seemed like we had seen them only a month before, rather than the previous year. That's the sign of a good relationship! It was tough to leave on Sunday. To leave the comfort of friends, knowing how much work I had to do by Friday...I would have rather stayed! So I had to finish an entire week's worth of work for Public Health by Wednesday morning, and am now beginning to feel the relief of completed obligations. Time for some R&R! This is what J.J. and Zoie have been up to, in case you were wondering. :)
The Buckingham Fountain in Chicago.
Jonathan looking at his reflection in "the Bean".
Me and my reflection in the Bean.
A view of the city from Millennium Park.
A view of the Lake from Navy Pier. It was very foggy that day - we had perfect weather.
A modern statue downtown, with the warm sun shining.
The four friends!
This was our view driving home. Not grand like Chicago, but lovely.
This month has flown by for us! We hope you've had a great July!

Happy 4th and new things

Happy 4th everyone! We hope you had a fantastic holiday! I unfortunately have no pictures to show for ours, but I am posting one my mom took, and a cute one of JJ. We spent the weekend before the 4th (or 24 hours of it anyway) with family. We got to see Uncle Rob who flew in at the last minute, Rachel (whose birthday is right around the corner), and the niece and nephews. It was really nice, especially since they weren't having their big celebration until Monday.
Monday we celebrated by having my mom, sister, and her boyfriend over for an indoor cookout. I say indoor cookout because we ate "cookout" food but didn't use a grill. It was great. Mom also gave me the china cabinet that she re-finished when I was a little girl. It was a nice stroll down memory lane - my cousin and I used to pretend "McDonald's drivethrough" through the top when it was disassembled. It strikes me how scary-effective McDonald's marketing is that we would play McDonald's as children. Yikes!
Monday night we met a friend and his family to watch the city fireworks. It was a great show - the first time we've ever been in town for the fireworks. It was a blast to spend the evening with our friend's four children - they are amazing. I want some!!
Yesterday I started teaching my very own college class! It was a blast! I really love it. I am lecturing for two hours every day for the entire month. I got to create the entire class myself, which was a lot of work. But it means so much more to hear a student say that they are enjoying the class when you design it yourself. It is such an odd feeling to finally be an instructor at a University. Am I officially a grown-up now?
Yet another new thing this month is a new-found love for Harry Potter. You may be asking - Are you crazy? You haven't seen the movies or read the books before now? The answers are "Yes, apparently," and "No"! We have never bothered to read or watch them before, but we thought it would be something fun to look into this summer. (Well, that's not entirely true - Jonathan took Ricky to see the first two movies when they came out years ago, and I went with my little sister, but we were stubborn teenagers at the time and haven't seen them since.) We're HOOKED! We are reading the books before bed, watching all of the movies, and we even listened to one of them on CD in the car. We love the writing style, the creativity, and the characters. Boy were we missing out! We want to get caught up before the final movie comes out this month.
Hope you all had a great holiday and are also enjoying new things!

June Happenings

We have been super busy this month! Here's what's been going on in our corner of the suburbs. :)
We started two jobs this month. We are tutoring writing at the University in the mornings, and again in the afternoons and evenings (and some weekends). I am taking a class in Public Health, which is taking more time than I anticipated. I am also prepping my class for next month, which is coming up far sooner than I am ready for. Our schedules are pretty packed. When we can, we try to spend time with people we are crazy about.
For example, early in the month we had dinner with some friends, who we have not seen in a year and a half. J.J. and their dog got along beautifully. They were playing for hours! They introduced us to some amazing Indian food.
Next, Jonathan's sister Lydia came for a visit. It was a quick one, but it was so nice to see her on her way to the next adventure. She is off to help advocate for children and we hope she will teach us some cool sustainability tricks when she gets back from an urban farm.
Also in that first week was my little sister's birthday. I cannot believe that she is 17! She was only 9 years old when Jonathan and I started dating. Where has the time gone? She finished her school year with amazing grades. We haven't gotten to officially celebrate yet, but I enjoyed taking her out to the stables where she is volunteering.
Ricky came for a visit the following weekend. It was so nice. We showed him around campus, had dinner and ice cream, and the next day introduced him to some of our friends at a festival downtown. It was a blast. He is also off on his dancing adventures for the summer.
We've been able to spend some time with friends who are leaving town. We helped one of them move last week - she's off to Philadelphia, and will only be coming back to defend her thesis late next semester. :( We were so bummed to see her leave! Our other friend has also left for most of the summer and part of the Fall. What am I going to do without my girls here? The department sure will feel empty without them...

I'm sure there are other things to report, but it's gone by in a whirlwind. We've been enjoying the beautiful weather, some time at home, and preparing for other big things coming up later this summer and fall.