14 Weeks and spring break!

This has been a great week - we've been off school and work, and I've been feeling really good. My clothes are really starting to get tight in the belly region - I walk around the house with the button undone most of the time. :) I've been craving lots of fresh foods - salad, corn on the cob, fish, and fruit. My burn is healing really well, though I think it's going to be ugly for at least a year. One moment of fuzzy-headedness can sure have yucky impacts! I'd say the only unpleasant symptom I'm experiencing this week is moodiness - ask Jonathan. I feel inexplicably edgy - like I'm on the edge of a tightrope, and the slightest breeze (an annoying dog, a rude driver) can set me off. It's funny that even feeling this way frustrates me! I know that I'm more impatient and moody, so I try to remind myself of the beautiful things in life rather than getting stuck on something irritating. I think I've done an okay job of controlling it so far - no one has gotten the finger when cutting me off in traffic.

Here is what is happening with Baby this week:
"This week's big developments: Your baby can now squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his thumb! Thanks to brain impulses, his facial muscles are getting a workout as his tiny features form one expression after another. His kidneys are producing urine, which he releases into the amniotic fluid around him — a process he'll keep up until birth. He can grasp, too, and if you're having an ultrasound now, you may even catch him sucking his thumb.

In other news: Your baby's stretching out. From head to bottom, he measures 3 1/2 inches — about the size of a lemon — and he weighs 1 1/2 ounces. His body's growing faster than his head, which now sits upon a more distinct neck. By the end of this week, his arms will have grown to a length that's in proportion to the rest of his body. (His legs still have some lengthening to do.) He's starting to develop an ultra-fine, downy covering of hair, called lanugo, all over his body. Your baby's liver starts making bile this week — a sign that it's doing its job right — and his spleen starts helping in the production of red blood cells. Though you can't feel his tiny punches and kicks yet, your little pugilist's hands and feet (which now measure about 1/2 inch long) are more flexible and active." (BabyCenter.com)Baby is the size of a lemon now!

Spring break has been awesome, and I am sad to see it end. We've been house- and dog-sitting all week. The break started off well by getting to see Jonathan's mom and sisters (Happy Birthday, Lydia!). Then we arrived to house-sit and have been doing a lot of relaxing. Most of the week has been composed of reading, spending time outside, watching a couple of movies, and catching up with friends over the phone or email. I was able to speak with my best friend in Belgium twice, which was a rare treat.

A few exciting things did happen. My good friend Emily came to visit! We went shopping and spent hours catching up over a late lunch. It was invigorating to spend time with her. We have gone through the same program in graduate school, and share so many similar values and goals. We both have a passion for taking anthropology and sharing it with people in the real world who can use it. We've both been frustrated with the tendency and value of publishing for colleagues in anthropology, the goal being to build one's CV rather than help people with the knowledge we have gained. It's certainly true that not all anthropologists are this way, but we feel that it is the trend in our department and sect of anthropology. We have another good friend and kindred spirit, who is currently living out the practical side of anthropology in Colombia right now. We could feel that she was there - love you, Ariel! Thanks for coming to visit, Emily! It did my spirit a lot of good.
Friday we went to an Art Museum downtown. It was a lovely experience. The museum was far more impressive than we anticipated - we were only able to explore one of three floors and the gardens outside. And it was free! Two Thinkers
The lovely gardens outside of the art museum
At lunch in the art museum restaurant

The weather has been incredible all week - at or near 80 and sunny most days. It has been a refreshing and much-needed break. I probably did not get as much work done as I should have, but I think I needed some physical and mental time-off from graduate school. After 4 years, the fatigue starts to build up. I wouldn't say that I'm excited to get back to campus on Monday, but I'm excited that we only have 5 weeks of classes left! Hope you all had a great spring break, or at least were able to enjoy the great weather!
PS - Thanks for all of the encouraging comments last week! I so appreciate it. I am happy to hear about other women's trials in pregnancy and motherhood, so long as the intent is not to make me dread the next 6 months and years of my life. If I have swollen ankles and heartburn in a few months, I'm not sure how dreading it beforehand will help! Thanks for being positive!

13 Weeks!

This week ushered in the second trimester - and I have been feeling great. As you can see, the belly has popped out significantly this week! You may also notice that there is a big burn on my stomach. I had one of those pregnancy amnesia moments. I was going to drain pasta for dinner. The strainer was in one side of the sink, but I apparently didn't think to use it. So I tilted the lid on the pot and splashed boiling water on myself. It hurt pretty bad, so I wasn't worried about it being a 3rd degree burn, but it looked pretty nasty. I've been putting aloe vera and cream on it to try to get it to heal faster. I'm just hoping it won't cause problems when the skin starts to stretch more.

Last week we had our second OB appointment. We weren't originally planning on having another ultrasound, but we decided to after I had a lot of abdominal pain that morning. Thankfully it turned out to be nothing baby-related (the pain). The baby is doing well! The Doc said the baby is longer than he expected and was incredibly active. He/she was kicking, punching, jumping, wiggling - practically dancing! The heart beat was strong at 160 beats per minute. We've always had a feeling that this baby is a girl, but the size and activity sure makes us wonder! We will have to wait until our 20 week appointment to find out the gender, but it's fun trying to guess until then.

Here are the ultrasound pictures. In the first one, you can see the baby's face - eyes, nose, mouth, and chin. In the second, the baby is turned to the back and side. You can see a little arm and hand. The third is taken from above and you can see the little hand more clearly. We were able to see the legs and feet on the screen, but they don't show in these pictures. Also, you may think that these pictures are not very cute, and perhaps you think the baby looks like an alien, but please don't tell a mother that. I had someone tell me that last week - who does that?!

Here is what is happening with Baby this week:
"Fingerprints have formed on your baby's tiny fingertips, her veins and organs are clearly visible through her still-thin skin, and her body is starting to catch up with her head — which makes up just a third of her body size now. If you're having a girl, she now has more than 2 million eggs in her ovaries. Your baby is over 3 inches long (the size of a small peach) and weighs nearly an ounce." Baby peach.

As I said, I've been feeling really good these past couple of weeks. I only had one day last week when I felt incredibly tired. This could just be due to not sleeping well lately. But I've had a lot of energy most days. I'm going yoga, jogging, and light lifting every week. My appetite has definitely increased. I am constantly thinking of food. I'm trying to keep it under control though - the old adage "eating for two" is false. I only need about an extra 300 calories a day in the second trimester. So far I completely love being pregnant. I know it's incredibly early, but I even thought I could feel the baby move this week. Some moms can feel it this soon, but not many do. I may just be looking too hard for it, but I look forward to the time when the movement is strong enough to know for sure.

I realize that I may feel some unpleasant symptoms and be uncomfortable in the heat of the summer, but I don't see why we should have such a negative attitude toward pregnancy. Yes, some women feel awful, but some don't. What's wrong with not feeling awful? It seems to me that it is almost a competition between women to see who felt the worst during their pregnancies. "I was sick the entire 9 months!" "You were lucky to have the baby in the winter - I had to suffer through the entire hot summer!" What is the point of this negative competition? Sure I've felt like crap some days, and early on, I felt pretty crappy all the time. But why should that be what I focus on? Why don't women stop to think about how their negative talk is impacting future moms? Don't they realize that the constant negativity and scare tactics do nothing but discourage women? I think we should be honest about our symptoms and not paint a false positive image, but can't we talk about the beauty of it too? About how carrying new life is what makes females the more valuable sex? We are special, people. Our bodies have the capacity to create and sustain life. Acknowledging our unique ability to further our species can empower women. I get so energized when I have a conversation with a mom who talks about how her pregnancy and birth experiences changed her life in positive ways. Of course they have things to complain about, but being negative does nothing to encourage or empower. It only instills fear in the process and diminishes the miracle. The purpose of this rant is simply to beg a favor - please do not bombard me with negativity when sharing your pregnancy/birth experience. I appreciate your sacrifices. But I do not want to hear why I should be dreading the next few months or the ultimate outcome. This is one of those circumstances in which I would prefer the old rule "if you have nothing nice to say, please say nothing at all." Okay, off the soapbox.

In other news, we start spring break this week! Hurray! We have nothing planned but to do as little work as possible, enjoy the weather, and relax.

Great article on Scientific birth

Many of you may know that Jonathan and I plan a natural birth with as few interventions as possible, providing my pregnancy continues to be low-risk. Some people think this is crazy, dangerous, naive, etc. But this decision is based on years of research and reading on maternal and infant outcomes. I could give you a list as long as my arm of books and research articles to read, which I have no doubt would convince you of the wisdom of low-intervention in low-risk pregnancies. Instead, a friend of mine alerted me to this brief article that is a good read. It is written by a philosopher of science whom I had the pleasure to hear speak at the last national conference I went to in New Orleans. This is just a tiny taste, and in the future I might post a list of resources for anyone who is curious or critical of this approach.
http://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2012/03/the-most-scientific-birth-is-often-the-least-technological-birth/254420/1/

12 weeks - the beginning of the second trimester!

Friday marked the end of the first trimester and the beginning of the second. Last week was an exciting one in terms of the pregnancy - my "bump" is now prominent enough for friends to notice and comment on. It's big enough that my clothes are starting to feel tight, and I can see less of my legs and feet when I look down. I even experienced the first pregnant lady goof - I went to yoga with a stain on my shirt, but didn't see it earlier because it was on a part of my belly that I can no longer see!
What has made this exciting is that Jonathan and I both have been snapped out of the surrealism of the past couple of weeks. My symptoms have been lessening the past two weeks, and we've been so busy that it has been easy to forget that I am really pregnant. Now it is impossible to forget about - I am constantly reminded now that the baby is real. It is such an amazing experience. We can't believe that the first trimester is over now - it went by so fast. Only a little over 6 months and our baby will be here.
My body is transforming in other ways. Our midwife could feel my uterus on Friday, and it is much higher and firmer than I thought. I also think the hormone relaxin may be starting to kick in, because my hips feel a bit looser than before, particularly after I exercise. My appetite is strong and I've had a new, as yet unfulfilled, craving this week - ice cream. I haven't actually had any yet, but I've been thinking about it a lot. Fruit is still a mainstay in my diet, plus tons of broccoli and brussels sprouts. I'm exercising nearly every day - light weight lifting, running (more like jogging), and yoga. So far I've gained about a pound, but I've definitely put on some inches in the waist and bust area. Other than a headache that I haven't been able to get rid of since Wednesday, and some sleep disturbances due to nasal congestion, I've felt good this past week. Here is how our baby is doing this week:

"The most dramatic development this week: reflexes. Your baby's fingers will soon begin to open and close, his toes will curl, his eye muscles will clench, and his mouth will make sucking movements. In fact, if you prod your abdomen, your baby will squirm in response, although you won't be able to feel it. His intestines, which have grown so fast that they protrude into the umbilical cord, will start to move into his abdominal cavity about now, and his kidneys will begin excreting urine into his bladder.
Meanwhile, nerve cells are multiplying rapidly, and in your baby's brain, synapses are forming furiously. His face looks unquestionably human: His eyes have moved from the sides to the front of his head, and his ears are right where they should be. From crown to rump, your baby-to-be is just over 2 inches long (about the size of a lime) and weighs half an ounce." (BabyCenter) Our own little lime!

This week has also been hectic due to developments with school and work. I had an upsetting misunderstanding with my adviser this week, which has caused me and Jonathan both to reflect a lot. It was kind of like the straw that breaks the camel's back in many respects. Some changes may be coming up in the next couple of years, but I'm waiting to make any major decisions for a while. Let's just say that the headache I've had began with this incident, and it is not the only one that has been caused by my department in the last four years. I'm feeling much better after examining my options, though, and have already let go of a lot of the hurt.
J.J. is loving this early spring weather.
In brighter news, the weather has been phenomenal this week. We spent some time playing outside. Also, Jonathan has some big news - he won 3rd place in the Research competition among graduate students at our university last night. He won first place last year in the Quantitative category, and won again this year in the qualitative category. Congratulations, honey! I'm so proud of you. You have demonstrated that you are truly a Renaissance Man. And your family loves you for it. This is J.J.'s idea of waking Daddy up. He gets on top of him and lays on his face. This can go on for half an hour. Much sweeter than any obnoxious alarm clock!

11 weeks!

Friday we hit 11 weeks - only one week to go in the first trimester! It has gone by so fast that it is hard to believe that we're almost a third of the way through. Here's what is going on with me and the baby this week.

How your baby's growing:
"Your baby, just over 1 1/2 inches long and about the size of a fig, is now almost fully formed. Her hands will soon open and close into fists, tiny tooth buds are beginning to appear under her gums, and some of her bones are beginning to harden.
She's already busy kicking and stretching, and her tiny movements are so effortless they look like water ballet. These movements will become more frequent as her body grows and becomes more developed and functional. You won't feel your baby's acrobatics for another month or two — nor will you notice the hiccupping that may be happening now that her diaphragm is forming."

I've been feeling pretty good. I still feel sick a bit in the mornings and evenings, but most foods sound good and my appetite is back to normal. (Well, not normal. I get a craving for something and have to have it - like hummus sandwiches last week or loads of broccoli and brussels sprouts with rice and cheese.) I can see that I'm starting to show more, particularly when I wear tight running clothes. My jeans started to feel tight for the first time this weekend. I've also been having round ligament pain - it's a sharp pain on either side of the abdomen that occurs when getting up too fast, moving suddenly, or sometimes, when laughing. It's caused by the round ligaments stretching to accommodate a growing uterus. Indigestion and sore breasts are still going strong. This sounds like a list of complaints, but I am actually ecstatic to be experiencing symptoms. This week has felt a bit surreal again, and the symptoms reassure me that I am still pregnant. I think perhaps feeling the baby for the first time or having other people notice (without me telling them) might make it sink in more. In addition to being a reassurance, I just think it's incredible that our baby's placenta is producing hormones that cause major changes in my body. My body was made to do this - I have long felt that becoming a mother would be a rite of passage, something that would link me with my mother, all of my female ancestors, and all female mammals on the planet. We all suffer in many ways to bring beautiful new life to this planet. Just like joining some kind of club that requires personal sacrifices, being able to call oneself a mother requires certain dues to be paid. I may not enjoy the actual dues when experiencing them (there's nothing pretty about morning sickness), but even in those moments I feel that I am fulfilling some greater purpose. This is something I always knew I was meant to do - it is a tremendously deep, emotional, transcendent, and impossible-to-articulate experience. This is just a cute picture of J.J. and Jonathan napping together on the couch.

In other news, we got through the halfway point in the semester last week, and spring break is rapidly approaching. I am so excited to be getting closer to spring and summer! The weather was beautiful last week and is supposed to be even more so this week - low to mid 70s most of the week. New life is everywhere, including inside of me.

10 weeks!

This week I started feeling much better overall. I feel much better during the day, with only a few, brief moments of nausea. Most evenings I still feel pretty rough - nauseous, very tired, and completely lacking the motivation to do anything but lay on the couch in pajamas. I feel pretty good the rest of the time, though! My appetite is returning with a vengeance - so many foods sound SO good now. We had Indian last night, and I desperately craved a hummus veggie sandwich yesterday. Hurray for food sounding good again! My energy throughout the day is returning - I had enough to workout three times last week, and ran 1.5 miles with J.J. and 3 miles on the trail with a friend. I don't notice any differences when I exercise except that I need a bit more air than usual - I take more frequent deep breaths. I've read that this has to do with increased blood flow - I already have 10% more blood than I used to. How cool is that!? I've also starting showing this week, and it's not just in my head. My friend and her mom noticed it yesterday when I was wearing tight running pants. This makes sense, given that my uterus has already doubled in size! Perhaps this is too much information for you, and if so, I apologize. But I find this entire process fascinating. My body is transforming - there are two where there was one. It is a unique time in life that passes so quickly, so I am trying to enjoy every minute.

Here is what is happening with the baby's development this week:
“Though he's barely the size of a kumquat [or a large olive, if you, like me, have no idea what a kumquat is] — a little over an inch or so long, crown to bottom — and weighs less than a quarter of an ounce, your baby has now completed the most critical portion of his development. This is the beginning of the so-called fetal period, a time when the tissues and organs in his body rapidly grow and mature. [In other words, baby is no longer an embryo - he/she has graduated to fetus-stage!]
He's swallowing fluid and kicking up a storm. Vital organs — including his kidneys, intestines, brain, and liver (now making red blood cells in place of the disappearing yolk sac) — are in place and starting to function, though they'll continue to develop throughout your pregnancy.
If you could take a peek inside your womb, you'd spot minute details, like tiny nails forming on fingers and toes (no more webbing) and peach-fuzz hair beginning to grow on tender skin.
In other developments: Your baby's limbs can bend now. His hands are flexed at the wrist and meet over his heart, and his feet may be long enough to meet in front of his body. The outline of his spine is clearly visible through translucent skin, and spinal nerves are beginning to stretch out from his spinal cord. Your baby's forehead temporarily bulges with his developing brain and sits very high on his head, which measures half the length of his body. From crown to rump, he's about 1 1/4 inches long. In the coming weeks, your baby will again double in size — to nearly 3 inches.”
There's also a very surreal video of what the baby looks like and is doing online: http://www.babycenter.com/fetal-development-images-10-weeks.

In other news, spring is making its appearance this week. I had the pleasure of running outside twice this week in beautiful weather. It was in the upper 60s on Thursday! Here are some photos taken in our yard. Seeing the first buds of new life always fills me with optimism. The family of deer is back! They are brave, but eye me curiously if I get too close.
Daffodils in our neighbor's yard - they are everywhere.
I love seeing new flowers next to old leaves.

Finally, we are celebrating lots of birthdays this week and month. Friday we celebrated my mom's birthday and had a belated-celebration for J.J. He turned 3 and we'll just say that my mom re-celebrated some birthday in her 30s. :) Today is also my cousin's birthday, our nephew's birthday, and we have more birthdays coming up in the next 3 weeks. I'm so glad that our baby won't be born in March - it's an expensive month! :) This has nothing to do with spring, but Zoie loves sitting in baskets. She also turned 7 this month.